I have a juicy topic to discuss with you today. Marriage. Life-long commitments to love. Soulmates.
You may have noticed that I love love, and that I love my husband. I am romantic and I am a relationship oriented person. I learned many of my major life lessons through the relationships I’ve had – and though that is not everyone’s path, and perhaps not the path I would necessarily recommend, it has been my experience and I honour it as such.
Many of you may also already know that I had an arranged marriage. I believe I have a valuable perspective as a person who has had relationships and has ultimately had an arranged marriage. Picking your life partner, your ride or die is a very important decision. And it is something we have to do when we’re relatively young and don’t necessarily have the life experience, maturity or wisdom to pick a good one. We may not even have the skills we need to grow love, I know I certainly didn’t. It’s one of those things you learn while doing. It is the great work of love.
This is not Reya’s first Christmas, but it is the first Christmas that she has some awareness of. She refers to all the Christmas decorations in store fronts as “chrissy-mas mess” and is so delighted by it all. She knows about snow, and snowmen, and christmas trees. She hasn’t quite got to grips with Santa Claus, and this is something I’ve been thinking about for some time now. How do I feel about this? What the purpose in perpetuating this fantasy for my child? Is this lie worth it? What do my children gain from this?
Imposter syndrome – feeling like you don’t belong in this room of brilliant people. Like it’s just a matter of time before they figure you out and realize they’ve made a mistake. That it’s all just been a ruse, and you’re a fraud. That you never deserved to be here, to win this, to get this, to have this. And soon, everyone will know. It is basically the act of attributing your successes to every reason under the sun other than your own great effort. Some of the most iconic, talented and intelligent people have experienced this – and it affects women especially (which really speaks to a much deeper rooted issue in regards to our societal standards).
It’s not worth it. And it’s disappointing. Because it needlessly prevents us from stepping into our greatness. It stops us doing the great work of our life. It perpetuates anxiety and low self worth.
In this blog post, I offer us a few suggestions on how to slowly dismantle and quieten the voice in our head that tells us we are not intelligent enough, not talented enough, not qualified enough, not worthy enough, and just not damn good enough for this magnificent life of ours.
Today I want to talk about something that I am going through in my life right now – and that is, my experience with anxiety. When it comes to making videos and writing blog posts for you guys, I always want to talk about something that I am directly experiencing or practicing in my life. And right now, the main thing is – anxiety, so…that’s what you’re going to get!
Last week, I talked about how important it is to do the right thing at the right time in your life. But what do you do when you’re confused about what the right thing is?! That’s what I wanted to address in the video I made for you this week.
A recurring lesson in my life. I never quite got it right. There are so many instances of my life that I look back on and think “If only I had done XYZ back then, but I didn’t”
Now, I don’t subscribe to the belief of “If only I had done XYZ back then, then I would be happier/life would be better” – because we just don’t have enough information to draw that conclusion. Life would be different, yes. but better? That is still undetermined. I am a woman who is committed to the path I am on, it is true and it is perfect for me and the lessons that move my heart the most. Life is designed that way.
There is a sometimes sense of missed opportunities. Of moments that have passed, that maybe if I had taken the right action, during what I now realize was the right time – then life would have landed me in a different space right now.
Hindsight is always 20/20. Present moment vision is something that must be cultivated, and involves a great deal of discipline, trust, courage and intuition. Present moment vision allows us to take the right action at the right time – because we see all. We see this moment for what it is, what it can be, and we move towards our potential.
Today I want to discuss how to face and overcome the traumatic experiences in our life. Life is hard. We all get served up experiences that can really rock us at our core, and is varied and unique for everybody. My question is, how do you go through these devastating and life altering situations and still continue to put one foot in front of the other, and still live with joy in your heart.