Becoming a joyful person

IMG_0864My sweet little Deki playing in the bubbles a couple of summers ago. Bliss & bubbles.

I am coming to understand in my life that there is a fundamental difference between pleasure and joyfulness. I realized that for me, I need to live a joyful life, and not one of chasing pleasure.

They are not necessarily the same things.

A life of reactivity

The thing is, pleasure makes us believe we are joyful, for that moment at least. But all we are doing is reacting to pleasurable things and then think we are joyful. This is not joyfulness. This is reactivity.

I don’t think it is wise to live our entire life as a reaction to everything that goes on around us. Because then we would just constantly up and down. Happy and depressed. We certainly wouldn’t have any peace.

Our inner chemistry

True joyfulness is a way of being. It is in being a joyful person. It has nothing to do with what happens  or does not happen around you. It is about your inner chemistry. Your inner reactions.
I have learned that being joyful takes spiritual strength because it does not depend on outward circumstances. In fact, many times, especially in the beginning, we must persevere to be joyful in spite of our outward circumstances. That is the first challenge.

Becoming a Joyful person


Consciously decide to stop living life as a reaction

Notice your reactions to things. Notice what makes you feel good and react joyfully, and what makes you feel bad.

For both these things, choose to respond calmly and with intelligence (appropriately).


Peace is a pre-requisite for joyfulness.

Understand the difference between pleasure and joy

Pleasure tends to be short lived, usually with consequences, and is often connected to physical sensations.

Joyfulness is long lasting, expanding, and connected to you state of being.

Find out what in your life invokes joyfulness. And do more of that.

Be pleasant

Joyfulness is a cumulation of pleasantness of thought, mind, emotions and behaviour.

Being pleasant means being a gentle, light, sweet presence in life. These qualities with an undercurrent of strength of self makes a powerful life-altering state of being. We can only be this way if our thoughts and emotions are also aligned in this direction.

Internalize: Whatever happens in this life, I will be alright, i WILL BE JOYFUL, THIS IS WHO i AM.

This means asking yourself the question “Who am I?” 

Who do you want to be in this life? What kind of person do you want to be?

Meditate on this vision. Make it everything. Constantly remind yourself of this vision.

> Meditate on this vision every day, just 5 minutes at the end of your own meditation practice is enough.

> Remind yourself of this when you are faced with an internal reaction to something. And act from this place.

We all have an intrinsic longing to be joyful. The desire is always in us. This is what motivates everything we do in life. So let’s be conscience of that. Let’s live our life with our eyes and heart open.

Just a few thoughts. What makes you joyful?
All my love to all of you
Malavika xo


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