5 December rituals to welcome the New Year

Wowowowow. Hold up. It’s not even Christmas yet, not even Thanksgiving, and I’m already talking about New Years Eve

Well, if you’ve been here a while you must know by now that New Years is my absolute favourite! And my preparations for it begin in late November, so yes, we do have to talk about it now.

Here are some of my annual rituals that create that New Year magic!

Declutter & donate

From the beginning of December, I begin my annual declutter. Creating physical space in my home brings a sense of lightness that I crave in the new year.

What can I let go of this year? How can I live a little lighter? In the past I have done this room by room, but this year I will try working through Marie Kondo’s categories of clothes, books, paper, komono, & sentimental.

I also pay particular attention to my digital clutter. For me, digital clutter is more overwhelming than physical clutter! My Evernote overflows with notes upon notes of my thoughts and musings. However, I have learned that even spending a quick 10-15 minutes a day organizing my laptop, documents, photos, and Evernote, makes a big difference!

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3 questions I ask myself when parenting my daughter

This parenting experience I am having is truly fascinating. I’ve spend the last almost 3 years building this brand new relationship with a brand new human being, and yet, I’m the one who feels brand new.

My daughter invites me to examine life more closely. To experience simple things with more depth and intention. To see so much of myself mirrored in another person. Everything has become a giant question mark, and life is more exciting this way.

Reya is almost 3. And there is a lot going on at almost 3. I’m just trying to keep up.

My very best parenting lessons come when I pay attention.

One day, I was paying attention, and I noticed that whenever Reya does something that I do not like or approve of, my go-to phrase is “That isn’t very nice, Reya.” or something of that variety.

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Simple solutions for inner aches

If you’re caught in an awful procrastination cycle

  • Take a life admin day – a whole day devoted to running those pesky errands.

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Inviting Akashik magic to my life

A few weeks ago I came across an Isha Hata Yoga instagram post, which shared a quote from Sadhguru about akashic energy.

“To nourish the human being into a greater possibility, it is very important how the water, the air, the earth, the fire and the fifth dimension, which is the largest one, the space or akash, behave. Today, modern science is recognizing there is something called as akashik intelligence; that is, empty space has a certain intelligence. Whether this intelligence works for you or against you will determine the nature of your life, whether you are a blessed being or one who is going to be knocked around for the rest of your life.

If you know how to get the cooperation of the akash into your life, this will be a blessed life. An intelligence that you have never thought possible will become yours, because an intelligence which is beyond your understanding and grasp is right now functioning right here within you, isn’t it? It is that intelligence which is holding the whole cosmos together; it is that intelligence which is the womb for creation. It is in the womb of that intelligence that all creation is happening, and it is not denied to you. Access is not blocked, it is just that you have never looked that way.

So to get the cooperation of the akash, there is one simple process you could do. After sunrise, before the sun crosses the 30-degree angle from the horizon, look up at the sky once and bow down to it for holding you in place today. After the sun crosses 30 degrees, sometime during the day, any time, look up and bow down again. After the sun sets, once again look up and bow down; not to some god up there, just to the empty space for holding you in place for today. If you just do this, life will change dramatically. If you consciously do this three times a day, if you get cooperation from akash, life will happen in magical ways.”

I decided that I would do this every day. Though I was earnest in my intentions, the practice initially felt somewhat mechanical. I would stand by the window or on our balcony, look up at the sky and express gratitude. After a week or so, my daughter decided to join me. It was very sweet. On one particular day, I was standing at my window in meditation, while she played in the living room. But, when I opened my eyes, she was beside me, facing the window with her eyes squeezed shut and palms together. It made me smile.

This went on for a couple of weeks.

A daily existential crisis

And then, Reya started to take a special interest in the planets, solar system and space. We’ve been watching videos, having conversations, and reading about it. At night she likes to fall asleep to the sound of me reading a wikipedia article about a space related topic (haha). What began as me simply delighting her curiosity, ended up with me tumbling into it too. I would continue to read after she fell asleep, and noticed a gradual inner restlessness build within me. I joked that I was having a daily existential crisis after she slept, but truthfully, it really shook me up. I read about the beginning of the universe, the birth and death of stars, and other monumental cosmic events. I look at the dark and glittering photos of space on reddit, and sometimes it sends shivers through my body.

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10 Mindset shifts that have changed my life

You cannot become the person you want to be when you are focused on the behaviour of another person

Why did they do that/say that?

I wonder what they meant by that?

Why did they use that tone with me? They must be upset/angry/sad with me etc.

What do they think of me?

What are they thinking about the situation?

When I find myself in a situation where I am tangled up in a web of worry and restlessness based on one of these thoughts- I remind myself that what I am doing is focusing on the behaviour and thoughts of another person. These are two things that I have no control over, and quite frankly, is not my business.

When you focus on another persons behaviour, a couple things happen.

Firstly, you spend a lot of time, energy and emotions on something you cannot control. It’s needless emotional labour, and it tires you out.

Secondly, you forfeit your opportunity to be the person you want to be.

As soon as I notice I am feeling anxious about something, I ask myself “is this about the behaviour/thoughts of another person?” If yes, I step out of my stories, and ask myself “Who do I want to be in this situation? And what can I do/say/act that is in accordance with that?”

And I do that thing. This is my way out.

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How to find your life purpose

I was working through through some of the anonymous questions submitted by readers for the next Q&A blog post when I came across a question about finding your life purpose.

This is a topic that has come up a lot in my personal life, and I’ve had many conversations about this with loved ones. Recently too! It’s a critical question to many and I felt it deserved a blog post of its own.

I would like to live a fulfilling life, as defined by me. The trouble is…I’m not sure what exactly it is I find fulfilling. I find my ideas on what fulfilling is to be fleeting. How can you know for sure what it is you want to invest your potential in/are supposed to be doing with your life. Thank you

The concept of a “life purpose” carries a lot of needless spiritual weight.

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How to have a good day

My body gives me great feedback on my state of being, and I try to pay attention. How swiftly I fall asleep at night lets me know how at peace I am with my life. How happily I wake up in the morning, tells me how much joy I have in my heart. When I notice changes in how my body functions, I know it is time to make some tweaks in my day to help grow happy things.

I’ve been thinking about what it means to have a good day. And while I have a lot of good days, sometimes on the days I wake up feeling apathetic about the day ahead – I wonder, why? What can I do to have a good day?

It isn’t often that we have a day full of only wonderful things, or a day full of only awful things. We tend to get a mix of both, along with some neutral tasks and events too.

I consider my “work” of the day to not be only to get through my daily to-do list, but to make each thing I have to do into the most wonderful thing it can be.

Here are some ways I do that:

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How do you transform yourself and your life?

Friends, I know I had promised to share my thoughts on conscious relationships this Friday – but I have been quite scattered this last week and couldn’t find the time to write it. So instead, I share with you something I had sitting in my drafts for some time. I know a couple of you were looking forward to that post and I am sorry it isn’t ready yet. It will be soon! 


We all know someone who completely transformed themselves – leaving almost no trace of their old self behind. Maybe it was a friend, maybe it was a friend of a friend of a friend.

We most often see these kinds of transformations on the physical level. It could be a person, who you know has spent their whole life struggling with their weight, and always putting themselves on new diets and work out plans – but always seems to remain the same. Until one day, something just clicks, and everything changes. Not only do they transform their physical body, but they transform their life too. Who are they are changes. And when you are with them again, they just feel different, somehow.

So you you get curious. You want to know what their nutrition plan is, or what kind of work outs they’re doing. And then you try these things too, following along closely like they’ve handed you a recipe for a new self that you too have been craving. And perhaps you do lose a few pounds, or maybe you don’t at all. And you think to yourself “I just don’t get it. why don’t I see the changes that they did?”

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Q&A: Chosen family, motherhood, living an ordinary life, free will & karma

Happy June full moon, readers! Today I answer some of the thought-provoking questions you submitted over the last month.

Greetings! I’m trans (ftm) and my family have basically disowned me ever since I came out. Struggling with feeling abandoned by my family. How do I move on from this kind of betrayal from the people who are supposed to love me no matter what?

I am so sorry you are going through this pain.

If your family disown you, then you certainly earn the right to choose your family. Your chosen family will be the people who show up for you every day. Not because of biology, obligation or societal expectations, but because they simply want to. In that way – you have the opportunity to create the truest version of “family.”

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How to stay consistent with your goals

On the first of January, I set myself a whole bunch of goals to achieve, as I have done many Januaries that have passed. Usually, by February, life settles back to how it has always been, and I settle back into who I have always been. I then live my life in a state of transit, waiting for the next chance to begin again.

It is the 6th month of 2020, and somehow, I am still on track. This is newfound territory for me.

This year, I did things a little different.

At the start of every month, I set myself goals that I want to achieve by the end of it. At the end of every month, I look back, reflect and tally up how I’ve done. I’ve done this consistently for 5 months now. I stuck with it, and that is no small thing, not for me. I’ve notoriously been an “all or nothing” kind of person.

I have not achieved every goal I set out to do. Let’s say I set myself 100 small goals between January to now. I have probably achieved about 70 of them. But…that’s still 70 steps in the right direction. That is momentum. That is a huge success!

Retrospectively, if I had not set myself these targets, and was just left to my own devices, I would have probably achieved around 15-20 of them haphazardly. The difference is monumental.

Today, I’m looking at what worked. What I did differently that made me DO differently this time around? Here’s what is working for me:

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