It’s not you, it’s me

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One of the most notorious phrases in the language of broken hearts.

So cliched. So cringe.

So faux-compassionate.

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How we transformed our marriage

Note: I had been wanting to share some photographs from our wedding day 2 years ago, but for some reason never got around to it. So I have included them in this post 🙂 The photographs bring me back to such a wonderful day in my life, and I hope you enjoy them. 

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I have something to tell you. My marriage is blossoming.

It is so full of love. And joy.

It feels like a flower that is in bloom in the summer. The season is right. The atmosphere is right. The flower grows and blooms and it is beautiful. I don’t need to do anything, I only need to admire its grace.

But it wasn’t always like this. There were a lot of bumps in the beginning.

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Valentines Day

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People like us,

we don’t need that much

just someone who starts,

starts the fire in the our

bonfire heart.

–  Bonfire Heart by James Blunt

We couldn’t do much to celebrate our anniversary in December because literally everything made me nauseated. I wanted to share a post with you all on our anniversary dedicated to my husband, and here it is now – better late than never.

Usually for valentines day, I prefer to make a small, hand made gift for my love. But this year, I went all out. This is what not having a job will do to you. I literally dedicated my entire day (and some) to making his valentines day experience. I sent some of these photos to my sister in law and she said “Omg, this is so extra.” and I thought – yes, this is absolutely, unmistakably “extra”.

(She also introduced me to this word a few weeks ago. She keeps us cool.)

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Why relationships should be right before they are good

We tend to believe that we should have a good relationship with everyone in our life. But have you found that this is almost impossible? Even if you feel totally good about them, they might start to hate you for something eventually. Or vice versa.
This is why I believe that it is more important for a relationship to be right, than for it to be “good”. And as it often happens, things that are right in life, usually turn out to be good after all.
So what do I mean by a relationship being “right” and “good”?

The Principles of Benevolance

According to the Vedas, we can live our lives under three main influences. We can live under the influence of ignorance and degradation, the influence of passion (how the majority of people live), and the influence of benevolence. This is a blog post on the principles of benevolence and some of the fundamentals of what it means to live a benevolent life.

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Considerations for choosing your future partner

I listened to a very interesting lecture by Dr. Oleg Torsunov on how to pick a partner to marry, so I thought I could share it with you today.

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5 things to remember before falling in love

Here are 5 things to remember before falling in love. Of course there are many more things we should try to keep in mind before we make a commitment to a partner, but for today, here are 5.

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The 7 stages of love: Love is not cheap

Love comes at a high price

Love is a spiritual attribute therefore it comes at a high price. That means that love is not something that comes passively, it must be worked at throughout life. All spiritually valuable commodities come at high price (such as patience, humility, kindness, optimism, honesty). That means that all these qualities are practiced consistently over time. You don’t become patient or humble overnight. Similarly with love, we do not become loving over night. We cannot achieve true love after 3 months with the partner we have chosen. A spiritually developed person, who has truly developed their ability to love, can feel this love for every living thing. They possess a special type of love for anyone.

It is impossible to decide to “love” and think of it in textbook terms. It is one thing to say “I have made the decision to love everyone” and it is a completely different thing to truly feel that genuine and sincere love in our heart for everyone. We can only start to nurture this loving feeling within our hearts, we can create an environment in our soul that allows love to grow without killing it. This can take a very long time, sometimes a whole lifetime, sometimes more than one lifetime. But that’s what we are here to do, so let’s get started today.

These days we throw around the word “love” like cheap currency. We make it synonymous with things like lust, passion, desire – but as you can see – there are other words for that. So we should try to keep the word “love” as pure as possible, and as true to it’s real meaning as much as we possibly can. Because love is not passion, nor is it desire, and love is definitely not lust. These feelings have nothing to do with real love, and don’t give any realistic indication of what real love is.

The rate of divorces and separations is increasing exponentially in our culture today. The Vedas actually predict that in the future, the couple who has remained together for life will be seen as saint-people – those who possess some mystical ability to hold a relationship together for life.

According to the Vedas, there are 7 stages of love in a marriage between two people.

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The 7 stages to the end of happiness in your relationship

According to the Vedas there are 7 stages of the destruction of relationships and family happiness. I will share them with you here today.

This information is from Ayurvedic doctor and guru of Vedic philosophy, Dr. Oleg Torsunov’s newsletter. I call it a horror story because it freaks me out! It shows how easy it can be to get trapped in a downward spiral to unhappiness without even realizing what is going on. After reading this information, I hope that we will be more aware of the warning signs of what begins the destruction of family happiness, so that we can avoid it in our own relationships.

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Love loans: where to go when the love runs out

 

Love loans

You are given a certain amount of happiness to enjoy with your partner. Kind of like a loan. To pay it back your loan, you must bring happiness to your partner and to people around you, and not only enjoy it for yourself.

When your love loan runs out

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