What to do when you’re falling behind in life

You may recall that in 2018, I wrote a blog post on the topic of falling behind in life. This seemed to have struck a chord with a lot of you, and I received many e-mails and messages from readers who shared their own struggles with the timing of their life. This article also happens to be one of my personal favourites from my blog, and one that I too go back to from time to time.

This has been a theme of my life since I graduated from med school in 2016 and found that my life took a different turn to my peers. It was a topic that filled me with dread in the pit of my stomach, accompanied with this incessant feeling of unworthiness. It was paralyzing and I just couldn’t do anything about it.

But you know what? I did. I did do something about it.

Today, I don’t feel the way I did a couple years ago. My life is still not where I thought it would be, and while it is much closer, I just love where it is right now. I love what has been and what is to come; and I love living life on the brink of both.

It took a great deal of daily practiced courage to change how I felt in and about my life. And I felt compelled to revisit this topic today and share with you some of the things that have helped me feel more secure in how my life is unfolding.

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Do the right thing at the right time

The right thing at wrong time is the wrong thing.

Timing.

A recurring lesson in my life. I never quite got it right. There are so many instances of my life that I look back on and think “If only I had done XYZ back then, but I didn’t”

Now, I don’t subscribe to the belief of “If only I had done XYZ back then, then I would be happier/life would be better” – because we just don’t have enough information to draw that conclusion. Life would be different, yes. but better? That is still undetermined. I am a woman who is committed to the path I am on, it is true and it is perfect for me and the lessons that move my heart the most. Life is designed that way.

However….

There is a sometimes sense of missed opportunities. Of moments that have passed, that maybe if I had taken the right action, during what I now realize was the right time – then life would have landed me in a different space right now.

Hindsight is always 20/20. Present moment vision is something that must be cultivated, and involves a great deal of discipline, trust, courage and intuition. Present moment vision allows us to take the right action at the right time – because we see all. We see this moment for what it is, what it can be, and we move towards our potential.

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An Introspective Q&A

Hi Friends,

I’d like to share my latest video with you today – an introspective Q&A where I touch on various topics like inspiration, forgiveness and handling life changes. I invite you to answer some of these questions yourself if you feel like it, and share what you feel comfortable sharing. I’d love for us to get to know each other better! I tag all of my wonderful readers. Do share a link of your blog post if you decide to respond that way.

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On falling behind in life

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I believe it is the norm for us to share our struggles after we have conquered them, our lessons after we have learned them. They say hindsight is always 20/20 after all. And to talk about something painful, when you are no longer in the crux of it, has always been a safer place to tell your tale.

This has always been the defaulted way I have shared the stories of my life too. That is, until my daughter died at 25 weeks of pregnancy and suddenly I had no choice but to share my story from the deep dark center of it. The thought of having to do that was incredibly unnerving and uncomfortable. I had no happy ending to pacify myself with, no lessons learned to lean on, no answers – only questions. All I had was the chaotic unravelling, the burning grief and the unsettling uncertainty of the unknown.

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Am I too sensitive?

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I think it is common knowledge that to be intuitive is to be sensitive.

We spiritual seekers, we wear our identity of a “highly sensitive person” like a badge. To be quite honest with you, I am not sure of how sensitivity is received in our society today; I don’t know if it is trendy to be sensitive, or if it is looked down upon and silently ridiculed. But it doesn’t much matter to me – because I know what it feels like, and I can decide if it is something I enjoy or not.

In our quest for a deeper spiritual connection in life, I find that I become more and more sensitive.

But then I noticed that…I am sensitive to the wrong things, to the things that do not necessarily serve my spiritual growth.

I became sensitive to people’s opinions, their moods, their approval or disapproval of me.

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Reflections of me

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I initially wrote this post in a private blog that I write in, but I thought I would share these self-reflections with you today – perhaps you and I have shared some of these experiences, or perhaps not. But I like to hear about the personal growth journeys of others, so I hope you may enjoy reading this too.

My life has been pretty easy for me. For the most part. Losing my first baby was a truly humbling experience. Everything else that I have struggled with in my life has been mostly my doing.

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27 years of life

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I am 27 years old today.

I am sitting at my parent’s dining table. It is 6:30 in the morning. The house is quiet and the new risen sun is pouring its warm white light through the window and onto me.

Over the last few years I have been compiling a list of lessons, reflections and realizations I experience in my life. 2 years ago I shared everything I had written in there to that point. You can find that post here.

Since then I have learned a few more things and I would like to share them with you today.


Never touch anything with half of your heart.

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2 things you need to become more spiritual (Part 1/2)

What is the purpose of spirituality?

I think it’s important to always know why you are doing something, because why you do something influences how you do something, and how you do something is how you live.

Spirituality is a very trendy topic these days, and everyone is doing it for different reasons. So, ask yourself, why do you crave it? What is the inspiration for you to sit, close your eyes, and meditate?

Do you do it because it will bring you peace and a stress free life?

Do you do it because it will make you a happier person?

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What is your dharma and why can’t you find it?

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From time to time I receive e-mails from readers of this blog. I think that is a beautiful thing and I am humbled that you would share such intimate and beautiful aspects of your life with me. With that, I have noticed that there a couple of questions that resides in the hearts of many people!

One commonly asked question is about love and relationships. Should you stay or should you leave? Is it “spiritually okay” to leave? How do you generate the internal strength to stay and persevere in love?

The other commonly asked question is in regards to your dharma in life and how to discover it. I have gotten e-mails from so many people who are worried that they are talentless and without a calling in life. And that is what I want to talk about today.

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Defining yourself and being defined by others

Sometimes we feel compelled to put labels on ourselves, on other people, on situations. I think this is how we attempt to make sense of life.

I think the first mistake we make is feeling we need to define ourselves and others.

The second is letting ourselves be defined by others.

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