You may recall that in 2018, I wrote a blog post on the topic of falling behind in life. This seemed to have struck a chord with a lot of you, and I received many e-mails and messages from readers who shared their own struggles with the timing of their life. This article also happens to be one of my personal favourites from my blog, and one that I too go back to from time to time.
This has been a theme of my life since I graduated from med school in 2016 and found that my life took a different turn to my peers. It was a topic that filled me with dread in the pit of my stomach, accompanied with this incessant feeling of unworthiness. It was paralyzing and I just couldn’t do anything about it.
But you know what? I did. I did do something about it.
Today, I don’t feel the way I did a couple years ago. My life is still not where I thought it would be, and while it is much closer, I just love where it is right now. I love what has been and what is to come; and I love living life on the brink of both.
It took a great deal of daily practiced courage to change how I felt in and about my life. And I felt compelled to revisit this topic today and share with you some of the things that have helped me feel more secure in how my life is unfolding.
A recurring lesson in my life. I never quite got it right. There are so many instances of my life that I look back on and think “If only I had done XYZ back then, but I didn’t”
Now, I don’t subscribe to the belief of “If only I had done XYZ back then, then I would be happier/life would be better” – because we just don’t have enough information to draw that conclusion. Life would be different, yes. but better? That is still undetermined. I am a woman who is committed to the path I am on, it is true and it is perfect for me and the lessons that move my heart the most. Life is designed that way.
There is a sometimes sense of missed opportunities. Of moments that have passed, that maybe if I had taken the right action, during what I now realize was the right time – then life would have landed me in a different space right now.
Hindsight is always 20/20. Present moment vision is something that must be cultivated, and involves a great deal of discipline, trust, courage and intuition. Present moment vision allows us to take the right action at the right time – because we see all. We see this moment for what it is, what it can be, and we move towards our potential.
Today I want to discuss how to face and overcome the traumatic experiences in our life. Life is hard. We all get served up experiences that can really rock us at our core, and is varied and unique for everybody. My question is, how do you go through these devastating and life altering situations and still continue to put one foot in front of the other, and still live with joy in your heart.
Cultivating and designing a worthy life is a balance of the goodness you infuse it with, along with the boundaries you place that protect your joy. I thought I would share with you some of the things I decided to stop doing, which I have found to be just as critical as the things I do do.
Ever since Reya turned one in January, I had been meaning to share my thoughts and experiences of one year of motherhood. Since Mother’s day was just a few days ago, I thought I would sit down and recollect the peaks and valleys of this new life of mine.
And it is an absolutely new life for me. The day my baby was born, a mother was born too. It has not always been an easy journey. Motherhood has stretched me and grown me, and I will share with you my honest and uncensored feelings about some of the more challenging aspects of being a new parent too. Nevertheless, as deliriously exhausting as it is, this new phase of my life has been indescribably rewarding.
I have accompanied this blog post with some of my favourite mama-daughter photographs that Reya and I have taken together.
On April 22nd, I turned 29. I think that of all the “holidays”, I love birthdays the most. I feel grateful to have had another year of life, with the promise of one ahead. Aging is a gift. The greatest wealth we have is our time and our health. And we’re not here for very long. Even the longest life, is pretty darn short.
Throughout the year, I write down all the lessons, reflections and realizations I have in various aspects of my life. I have shared these with you over the past few years – 25, 27, 28.
I hope you enjoy reading through these reflections, perhaps with a nice hot cup of coffee or tea, because it’s a long one. My life is always so rich with growth lessons, especially this last year. The lessons I’ve learned this year have been centered around facing my fears, failure, mystical experiences, shame, ambition, and mastery.
In my experience, there are two situations when life can feel overwhelming. The first, is a burn out, where you’ve been applying yourself so fully, that what you probably most need – is some rest.
The other type – is when life is demanding a lot from you, and you consistently feel unable to meet your obligations. You start procrastinating on important and unimportant things. You try to avoid life. Things just keep piling up. And before you know it, you find yourself in a s***storm that you don’t feel you can handle. That’s the type of overwhelm I would like to talk about today – mostly because, that’s the type of overwhelm I’ve been dealing with. Fun.
I made a decision that something needs to change. I have been implementing these 4 practices that I am about to share with you, into my life for the last 2 weeks, and I’ve noticed such a beautiful transformation in my inner resilience and in how my life feels.
So if you find yourself feeling overwhelmed and underprepared – these 4 steps can help you get back in the driver’s seat of your life.
Today I woke up in peculiar kind of way, with a surreal sense of the swiftness of time passing.
I am 28 years old now, slowly inching towards 30. It occurs to me that in two years I will take these 10 monumental years, package them neatly into what I will from that point onwards refer to as “my twenties” and file it away.
I believe it is the norm for us to share our struggles after we have conquered them, our lessons after we have learned them. They say hindsight is always 20/20 after all. And to talk about something painful, when you are no longer in the crux of it, has always been a safer place to tell your tale.
This has always been the defaulted way I have shared the stories of my life too. That is, until my daughter died at 25 weeks of pregnancy and suddenly I had no choice but to share my story from the deep dark center of it. The thought of having to do that was incredibly unnerving and uncomfortable. I had no happy ending to pacify myself with, no lessons learned to lean on, no answers – only questions. All I had was the chaotic unravelling, the burning grief and the unsettling uncertainty of the unknown.
I once got an e-mail from a reader who once asked about the magic of life, how to see it, how to feel it, how to live from within it.
The magic of life; the most beautiful thing about it is that it is already the fabric of everything, we just have to notice it.
Here are some of the magic that I have noticed in my life. I hope that it may bring a soft, sweet awareness to your day.
Most of the things I have written here, are things we do or experience everyday, but we do it mindlessly, without noticing the majesty of it all. When we do that, we miss the magic of life. I believe that bringing some awareness to these simple acts and truths, can truly transform your life. It has certainly changed mine.