Tag: love

Words that matter; conversations with children

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Reya stepped on Gautham’s head while he was laying down and an argument ensued. Gautham tried to talk to her but she was too upset. He left the room and Reya was crying. I went over to her and we talked. Here are some parts of that conversation.

Reya: *Crying* Daddy is angry at me and he was so rude to me!
Me: I saw that. How did it make you feel?
Reya: It made me sooo sad 😭
Me: Why do you think daddy acted that way?
Reya: I don’t wanna talk about that part. (*lol I love her honesty)
Me: I think we need to talk about all the parts but we can do after some time has passed.

Minutes later, when she was ready to talk about that part;

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How to create a blueprint for conflict: a map back to love

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A relationship is a wonderful tool for your spiritual growth.

How you as a couple respond to conflict can tell you a lot about a relationship.

You can be in a partnership where every conflict pushes you further and further apart, or you can be in a relationship where every conflict brings greater intimacy and opportunities to get free.

And for the spiritual seeker getting free is the most important thing.

In the heat of conflict, it is very difficult to remain conscious. Most of us get swept up in our triggers, our stories, our opinions, our unhealed trauma.

I have learned that what we fight about is not as important as how we fight. I’ve learned that if you put your attention on fighting better, the topics that come up also tend to soften.

It is all part of learning to love another human being, and yourself.

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Simple daily relationship practices to grow love

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My posting schedule has become a little erratic. After 3 months working from home at my parents house in BC, we moved back to Minnesota where I’m involved in a few research projects. I’m still finding my groove here. Reya is back at daycare. My husband and I largely work from home but I do go into the hospital on days where I have patients to enroll or meetings to attend.

I am applying for Internal Medicine residency later this year. It’s sort of a pinnacle moment of my life; something I’ve worked towards for the last few years, and I’ve battled a lot of inner demons to get to this place. The application process is extensive, and along with working and spending time with my husband and Reya, I don’t have a lot of free time at the moment. It’s something I need to prioritize over the next few months, so while I will continue to post consistently on here, the interval between posts may be a little longer.

That being said – today I want to talk about relationships and the little ways we can steadily show up to do the work of love. Here are some simple practices that grow love and connection between my husband and I during this busy season of life.

Make their happiness your priority

Every morning, I ask my husband 2 questions.

“What is one thing you could do today that would make you feel productive?”

This is usually one of his most important tasks of the day. The needle mover. Things like “Finish the brief I’m working on / this chapter / this draft / start my online course etc”

Followed by;

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Thoughts on finding the one

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I have a juicy topic to discuss with you today. Marriage. Life-long commitments to love. Soulmates.

You may have noticed that I love love, and that I love my husband. I am romantic and I am a relationship oriented person. I learned many of my major life lessons through the relationships I’ve had – and though that is not everyone’s path, and perhaps not the path I would necessarily recommend, it has been my experience and I honour it as such. 

Many of you may also already know that I had an arranged marriage. I believe I have a valuable perspective as a person who has had relationships and has ultimately had an arranged marriage. Picking your life partner, your ride or die is a very important decision. And it is something we have to do when we’re relatively young and don’t necessarily have the life experience, maturity or wisdom to pick a good one. We may not even have the skills we need to grow love, I know I certainly didn’t. It’s one of those things you learn while doing. It is the great work of love.

Here are some of my thoughts on finding the one.

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It’s not you, it’s me

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One of the most notorious phrases in the language of broken hearts.

So cliched. So cringe.

So faux-compassionate.

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How we transformed our marriage

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Note: I had been wanting to share some photographs from our wedding day 2 years ago, but for some reason never got around to it. So I have included them in this post 🙂 The photographs bring me back to such a wonderful day in my life, and I hope you enjoy them. 

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I have something to tell you. My marriage is blossoming.

It is so full of love. And joy.

It feels like a flower that is in bloom in the summer. The season is right. The atmosphere is right. The flower grows and blooms and it is beautiful. I don’t need to do anything, I only need to admire its grace.

But it wasn’t always like this. There were a lot of bumps in the beginning.

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Valentines Day

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People like us,

we don’t need that much

just someone who starts,

starts the fire in the our

bonfire heart.

–  Bonfire Heart by James Blunt

We couldn’t do much to celebrate our anniversary in December because literally everything made me nauseated. I wanted to share a post with you all on our anniversary dedicated to my husband, and here it is now – better late than never.

Usually for valentines day, I prefer to make a small, hand made gift for my love. But this year, I went all out. This is what not having a job will do to you. I literally dedicated my entire day (and some) to making his valentines day experience. I sent some of these photos to my sister in law and she said “Omg, this is so extra.” and I thought – yes, this is absolutely, unmistakably “extra”.

(She also introduced me to this word a few weeks ago. She keeps us cool.)

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A life well lived: How to nourish your mind, body & soul every day

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I have really been indulging in my blog for the last few weeks, but today I have a short and sweet post for you.

Every day I try to nourish myself so that I may grow into a happier person and live a beautiful and blessed life. It is a daily practice because a life well lived, a charmed life, is created one day at a time.

Writing this post has reminded me how simple it is to nourish and nurture yourself every day.

I ask myself these questions:

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The past is the past is the past: How to move on from your past

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Hi beautiful people.

I’m starting a new small series on the topic of Breaking Karmic cycles. This series contains 3 parts.

  1. The past is the past is the past: How to move on from your past
  2. Life is not a crisis: What to do when you are tired of your own drama
  3. Breaking free from your Karmic Cycles

 

The past: A story we love to tell. Or a story we love to hate. Either way, as long as we keep digging into our past, we’re stuck. Because life doesn’t happen in the past. Life happens now.

Why do we look into the past?

Why is our past so mesmerizing? Why does it draw us in with so much magnetism?

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Morocco: Nkob (Part 2)

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Our journey begins in a dark red hotel room in Marrakesh. I’ve never been in a room that was so ominously…red.

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