My posting schedule has become a little erratic. After 3 months working from home at my parents house in BC, we moved back to Minnesota where I’m involved in a few research projects. I’m still finding my groove here. Reya is back at daycare. My husband and I largely work from home but I do go into the hospital on days where I have patients to enroll or meetings to attend.
I am applying for Internal Medicine residency later this year. It’s sort of a pinnacle moment of my life; something I’ve worked towards for the last few years, and I’ve battled a lot of inner demons to get to this place. The application process is extensive, and along with working and spending time with my husband and Reya, I don’t have a lot of free time at the moment. It’s something I need to prioritize over the next few months, so while I will continue to post consistently on here, the interval between posts may be a little longer.
That being said – today I want to talk about relationships and the little ways we can steadily show up to do the work of love. Here are some simple practices that grow love and connection between my husband and I during this busy season of life.
Make their happiness your priority
Every morning, I ask my husband 2 questions.
“What is one thing you could do today that would make you feel productive?”
This is usually one of his most important tasks of the day. The needle mover. Things like “Finish the brief I’m working on / this chapter / this draft / start my online course etc”
I have a juicy topic to discuss with you today. Marriage. Life-long commitments to love. Soulmates.
You may have noticed that I love love, and that I love my husband. I am romantic and I am a relationship oriented person. I learned many of my major life lessons through the relationships I’ve had – and though that is not everyone’s path, and perhaps not the path I would necessarily recommend, it has been my experience and I honour it as such.
Many of you may also already know that I had an arranged marriage. I believe I have a valuable perspective as a person who has had relationships and has ultimately had an arranged marriage. Picking your life partner, your ride or die is a very important decision. And it is something we have to do when we’re relatively young and don’t necessarily have the life experience, maturity or wisdom to pick a good one. We may not even have the skills we need to grow love, I know I certainly didn’t. It’s one of those things you learn while doing. It is the great work of love.
Note: I had been wanting to share some photographs from our wedding day 2 years ago, but for some reason never got around to it. So I have included them in this post 🙂 The photographs bring me back to such a wonderful day in my life, and I hope you enjoy them.
I have something to tell you. My marriage is blossoming.
It is so full of love. And joy.
It feels like a flower that is in bloom in the summer. The season is right. The atmosphere is right. The flower grows and blooms and it is beautiful. I don’t need to do anything, I only need to admire its grace.
But it wasn’t always like this. There were a lot of bumps in the beginning.
We couldn’t do much to celebrate our anniversary in December because literally everything made me nauseated. I wanted to share a post with you all on our anniversary dedicated to my husband, and here it is now – better late than never.
Usually for valentines day, I prefer to make a small, hand made gift for my love. But this year, I went all out. This is what not having a job will do to you. I literally dedicated my entire day (and some) to making his valentines day experience. I sent some of these photos to my sister in law and she said “Omg, this is so extra.” and I thought – yes, this is absolutely, unmistakably “extra”.
(She also introduced me to this word a few weeks ago. She keeps us cool.)
I have really been indulging in my blog for the last few weeks, but today I have a short and sweet post for you.
Every day I try to nourish myself so that I may grow into a happier person and live a beautiful and blessed life. It is a daily practice because a life well lived, a charmed life, is created one day at a time.
Writing this post has reminded me how simple it is to nourish and nurture yourself every day.
I really needed to take a break from studying for my exam on Thursday. My brain feels like a ball of fuzz.
The other evening, I was in the living room with Sean, my roommate. And in my sleepy-brain-fuzzy-haze, I put the lights out in the room and then casually sat down to eat dinner (in the dark). Sean got up and put the light back on. I felt like something weird had just happened, I asked “Did I just….put the lights off?!” It was so funny! We laughed about that for a while. The strangest thing is that I did it AGAIN later that night! Haha.
So, given my history of doing weird things when tired, I think it is best I do take a break from studying.
Instead, I want to share with you some of my most loved quotes and poems by the Sufi poet/mystic Rumi.
This collection moves me and speaks to parts of me that are unspoken. That is poetry. It is interesting to me that while I love to write and document my life through prose and journalling, some of the most beautiful or haunting things that have happened to me are best expressed as poetry. I wonder why that is.